Мурадова Метанет Маликовна : другие произведения.

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  In a moment it became animated to his life, which years ago he lived in London.That times Mohan was very young like Om.When Om was sixteen years old, Lakshmi was fourteen.She was emaciated and timid girl.She was in the staying-school in London.Ever weekend Om went to her flamk.Sometimes they took a walk to the city three together.For Mohan she was only a little and feeble girl.But he was astonished with her long plaits.When Mohan returned back from London;Lakshmi was ill to his regret and was in bed.Om didn"t understand the grief of his sister.
  At last,they thought that she needs to change environment, that"s why Om brought her to India.And put in order to his old aunt"s place.
  From the beginning of her coming to India, Lakshmi started to look for Mohan.Time was passing.But one day she saw him on TV.
  From that day she began to take a stroll him and lived this way.
  Ahe left behind years this way.Her old aunt died, and at last in that famous night...Mohan naturally without recognizing her, He took her to his home and bed.
  Lakshmi slept with him and ran away.She didn"t go out for days and lived both happiness and sadness, which took place.
  Om bought that necklace for her from one seller, who sold ancient things.In truth the medallion of it was opened.Om put his photo inside it, and caused jeweller to write in it the writing: "To my dear sister "OM".
  She must come to take back the same necklace.She suffered two months by anyway.But at last one night she was sent to his work again.But she met Mohan with another woman, that"s why she hid herself from them.This event shaked her.Even, when she came home hardly, then she fainted in front of the door.
  After two days she understood that she is prednant.To tell the truth she was glad for it.But from the other side she didn"t know what to say to Om...When Om returned back,Lakshmi was seven monthed pregnant.To see his sister in this position touched Om"s honour.
  After the second slap he asked:
  -Who is the father of it?
  -...
  -Either answer me or I"ll kill you!
  -Kill - Lakshmi whispered.
  Om took the knife and rest against to her throat.
  -Answer! Who is the father of it?- he shouted, but Lakshmi didn"t tell anything.
  -Now you don"t have a brother named Om!
  Om flinged out the knife and left.And really he never returned to India.There were saome days when he looked at his sister"s pictures and wept., but there were some days he rended them.But only this year a phone call came.
  -Omji? - a little child"s voice asked.
  -Yeah. - Om amswered.
  -I"m Narayan and you are my uncle.
  Om went pit-a-pat.
  -I am your uncle?
  -Who said that?
  -My mother.
  -I haven"t any sister.
  -But I have an uncle.May I know him?
  Om suffocated with rage.-Oh, uncle, come here one day, please.That"s your own business to talk with my mother or no.Come here and let me know you, please.
  -I will think, - he said and hanged the receiver of the phone.
  It didn"t pass one week, When Om was in India...One day he secretly took a stroll to Lakshmi"s home.Little Narayan was very lovely...
  When Lakshmi went to work Narayan was in the temple.Then Om came to temple and approached Narayan.Narayan recognised his uncle and rapidly made a bow.Om smiled and embraced him.And smelled.Narayan smelled like his sister.
  He kissed him and cuddled to his breast.He suppressed his anger and asked:
  -Is your name Narayan?- He heard when Lakshmi called him.
  -Yeah.
  -Where is your father?
  -He has too much work to do.
  -Did he come home?
  -No he didn"t.But one day he will come.
  -Did you see him?
  -No.But my mother told me about him and I know.But he will come very soon.I am praying Shree Krishna every day.He promised me.
  -Who promised you, Shree Krishna?
  -Yeah.I saw him in my dreams He asked that do you want to know your father?I answered that yes,I want it so much.And he said that OK.
  -How you will know him?
  -With this - said Narayan and showed long strange iron necklace which was hanging from his neck.
  -What"s this? - Om glanced at the iron strangely and asked.
  -This is the key of the one necklace medallion.That necklace just is in my father.My mother said so.
  It was the same necklace which Om saw in Mohan"s hands and flied into rage...He bought it for Lakshmi.
  Open this necklace"s medallion! - Om cried.
  -The medallion? - Mohan wiped his mouth and asked.
  -It"s nearly six years with me I couldn"t open it. Can it be opened?
  -Is she drive taxi?
  -No, it was car, what she buy on her own money, buy for me, that I come back and work here.But I was evil to her.
  I will kill you, Mohan! I promised to myself that I will kill you! - said Om and aimed the pistol against him.
  Narayan who set on the ground floor and waited for his uncle heard the ballyhoo. He slowly rose to the upper part.
  When Mohan approached and leaned against pistol,
  Narayan cried "Uncle!"- He ran and embraced Om"s knees and Mohan winced. Om pulled the trigger of the pistol ...Mohan forgot about Om and squated in front of Narayan. Mohan looked at him with wonder, Narayan looked at Mohan,who was on the point of crying and whispered:
  -Mohanji...
  -Hmmm...Mohan couldn"t speak.His tear drop began to strain quietly. Then Narayan looked at his uncle and said:
  -What"s the matter uncle?Please forgive him.
  -Go and wait for me on the ground.
  Om got angry.
  -Uncle.
  -You didn"t hear me?! - Om rated.Narayan looked at Mohan and said:
  -My uncle is soft-hearted.Don"t be afraid Mohan ji I will pray for you...OK?
  Mohan suppressed his anger and shaked his head with consent.Narayan left the room.Om was sad, Mohan stood erect, it was filtered a tear drop by drop from his reddened eyes like a blood and whispered:
  -Is he my son?
  -Never! You haven"t any son! I am going, if you will come fore-part to me I will kill you! - Om slumed the door with anger and went out.
  
  ***
  Om called Narayan.After that appearance which Narayan saw in the morning, he calmly became tangled all day.At last when Om hailed him side and approached to his uncle.
  -Today"s ekadashi?
  -No.
  -Do you fast?
  -I fast.
  -Why?
  -For Mohanji.
  -Why? Who is Mohan for you? Why are you worried for him?
  -My mother said that I must respect him.
  -How your mother told you? How? I said she is in the sky.- Om said.
  -She told that your uncle didn"t let me go.Ask him to set me free.Because I must go.
  Om suffocated with rage.
  -How is it possible?She is talking to you but not to me.
  -You didn"t want to see her.- said Narayan.
  -Hm..- Om stood erect.- Did she say that?
  -Yes.
  -That"s why she didn"t come?
  -She is here-said Narayan.
  Om bristled.
  -Now?
  -Yes now.
  -Hm, - Om laughed ironically, Ask her what she wants besides it?
  Narayan was over fore-part Om and looked at his mother.Om looked at the direction where Narayan stood.
  He looked at the same place but he didn"t percieve anything.
  -She wants you to forgive him.
  Om knitted brows and moved apart Narayan.
  -She says that today I am asking for the last time.Let him forgive me and then I can go easily.-Narayan whispered.
  -Tell her that she can go where she wants.Give me the iron which is on your neck.
  -Why? - Narayan put his hand on the medallion and asked.
  -I must open the necklace.
  -Which necklace?
  -That necklace.
  -That necklace must be with my father.
  -It"s on me.
  -It can"t be true.That"s not the same necklace then.
  -That"s the same necklace Narayan.I bought it for your mother.
  -My mother said that necklace must be with my father.It couldn"t be on you.
  -Just it"s in me.Let"s open it.
  -No I can"t.
  -Why?
  -Then I can"t find my father.
  -You don"t have any father.
  -I have,I have a father.
  -May be you have, but we will never know and meet him.
  -No! We will know him...Krishnaji promised me.He took my mother, but my father will come.It can"t be true that he will leave me alone.
  Om approached to Narayan who was crying and squated in front of him.
  -You are not alone.Everytime I will be with you.Don"t cry.Let"s open the necklace OK?
  -No! - Narayan pulled back carry and put it in its place.- Give it to that person from whom you took it.I want to know my father.
  Om was shaken.He went down to the yard and lit a cigarette...And settled on the net swing and lay on it.
  -Give it back, Om.
  Om turned back to the voice. Lakshmi stood in front of him.
  -Laki?
  Om stood up.
  -Yes.
  -You...But you are...in the hospital. How did you come here?
  -Just now you wanted to see me. And you desired from God sincerely. That"s why I came.
  -No, I don"t want to see you.- Om assumed a grave air.
  -Don"t deceive yourself.
  -Why did you come?
  -Give the necklace to Mohan. He must give it to Narayan. Then Narayan can"t recognise his father.
  -Why you didn"t say it then? Why you didn"t say ithat he is Mohan?
  -You wanted to kill him.
  -I still want it.He striked me on my back.He smudged your name.He disjoined us.Besides it now because of him I must lose you to tally.I hate him.
  -That"s not his sin.TYhis is our fortune.And the results of the wishes which we desired from God.
  -I don"t understand.Did you wish from God to die?Did you wish a child without a father?
  -Not so.I was attached to Mohan from my childhood.If only he were near me, only once then I don"t want anything.I prayed such prayers.If only I had a child from him.I prayed God all days and nights.I achieved my dreams as I wanted.More later if only brother receive me and love him.I agree if he will never talk to me.If only my child"s father wants it I can die for him.Those were my desires.I can"t reproach my fortune ,Om.
  -Yeah...But what"s my sin?What"s the reason of taking the tortures?
  -I said that our fortune.Everybody must be attentively when they are desiring anything in any case or under some circumstances God hears us.Nobody will fall remote from their fortune and intentions Om.
  -What can I do now?I wish you be healthy.Why aren"t you cured?
  -My way is over.You can"t do anything.
  -I don"t want you to die.I can"t stand it, - Om"s eyes were on the point of crying.
  -Don"t lose your strength.
  -Forgive me.- Om whispered.
  -You must forgive me.- Lakshmi said and approached to her brother.
  -I abandoned you alone for six yearsAnd never was interested in what you are eating or drinking and how you lived with a child.That trimes I was angry with you.But I don"t want such end.Behave me, please.
  Om"s voice was broken.Lakshmi wiped his tears which were filtered to his nandsome cheek,Om took her hands and put them on his cheeks and with broken voice:
  -Don"t go, - he said- I love you so much.
  Lakshmi softly winded round him.
  -I will be in your hearts.Who comes one day, they leave one day,Om.This body is tenmporary for us.That"s why don"t lose your strength.Give a chance to Mohan.He needs Narayan and Narayan needs him,too.
  -I need a sister.
  -I must go Om...I must go.- -Lakshmi left him slowly.
  -Laki...Laki...don"t go Laki...- Om opened his eyes.Lakshmi wasn"t there.
  
  ***
  Mohan came to decision.He presented the office to Anand, but he put the money on orphan"s account.He thought that he has the last duty.He must go to that lady who is condemned to the apparatus and living in the fount because of him.If they wanted he was ready to give the pecuniary aid.He came to hospital alone, without any bodyguard or driver.He approached to the door and stopped.Suddenly he was uncased.At last he stored up fresh energy and entered in.His first notion was very strong medicine smell and the apparatus voice which was chirred up.
  There was a curtain in front of it.He opened the curtain and approached to the bed.He was horrified from the appearance, which he saw.Lakshmi who visited him for days just she was in the perturbed position to the apparatus very slow.He stepped back some steps and leaned against the wall.The he turned his face towards the wall and began to breathe jerky.As though he didn"t suffocate.As though he was in one strange dream and he tried to get up, but he couldn"t.
  How can it be?
  How did Lakshmi come to his place?He can be a mad.He became into wax from alarm and a marement.He returned and looked at the bed.And he stepped one or two steps towards the bed.But he couldn"t undergo to the strained psycological condition.First he was dirry.He moved unsteadily on his feet and settled near the bed.Then he lost his conciousness.
  -Mohanji...Mohanji...
  Mohan turned and looked to the voice.It was Lakshmi.
  -You?- Mohan stood up and looked at her with great astonishment.
  Then turned and looked at the bed.
  Lakshmi"s bosy lied on the bed in position to continiue her life with apparatus, Mohan turned and looked at Lakshmi who stood in front of him.
  -When can it be? - he asked.
  -I said that tell the truth we are not only bodies.
  -You didn"t die yet.How can you be a spirit?
  -Spirit doesn"t only belong to the dead people, Mohanji.
  To tell the truth we are spirits,eiother alive or corpse.
  -Where are you now?In that world?
  -You are asking childish questions.- Lakshmi smiled.
  -But I don"t understand anything.
  -I am on the eve of leaving temporary life.
  -But how can you come this way?
  -That"s our God"s endless favour.
  -Why didn"t you say that I have a son?
  -I feared that it will be hard for you.
  -Person"s child is never hardness for him.
  -It didn"t happen with plan.
  -In anyway, you might say it to me.
  -I came twice, but I saw you with other women.And I didn"t want to disturb you.
  -You are so unjust.You loved me from the childhood and kept silence.After years you came and played hide-and-seek with me.You didn"t say the reality in my bed, too and you didn"t say your name either and went.
  I was self-willed man.But your love was able to change me.I waited for you for days,for nights.But after that night you didn"t come.I thought that may be I am valueless for you.But I never forgot you.You were the first virgin in my life.On that women whom I met Was not first and I didn"t get attached to them like you.I never dreamed of anybody.You deprived me of so much things.Do you know it?
  -When we are dreaming something we must be attentive Mohanji.Simply you dreamed about one son.
  -How do you know?
  -I read your interview.
  -I said it 2-3 years ago.But my son is 6 years old.That times you didn"t know it.
  -You are right , I didn"t know it.But our God knows everything.He gave us our dreams as we wanted to tell the truth.We don"t have right to express our dissatisfaction.
  -In your mind how I can go out in front of my son?
  -Don"t worry,you must only give a necklace to him.
  -Then?
  -Then choice is his.
  -Which choice?
  -He will stay either with you or with his uncle.
  -I understand.Buit the neckalce is not on me.Om took it.
  -He will give it back.
  -He hates me.
  -You are his soul friend.For years you you ate and drank together.Has he such cruel heart?
  -He is such a person who didn"t forgive his sister.
  -If he didn"t forgive me then how can he take care of me?
  -I will look after him.
  -I have two conditions.
  -What is the condition?
  -Give right of choice to Narayan.Don"t force him.
  -He is a child.
  -Really?
  -Yeah. I can say that he is very clever for his age. But he...
  -Mohanji...
  -Ok.- Mohan append her signature.- The second condition?
  -Set me free.
  -What? - Mohan became entangled.
  -What do you mean?
  -Set me free.because I must go.
  -What does this mean?
  -Put out the apparatus.Om will never put it out.
  -No..Don"t do it to me.- Mohan was horrified.- -So much unjustice is enough.
  -Mohanji.
  -No - Mohan cut her short. - I can"t kill you.What are you saying?
  -Let me find rest.That"s why you must put out it.I am neither here nor there.That"s not right.
  -I am not God.Don"t ask this from me.How can I live with this tormenture?
  -Mohanji..Do a favour to me.
  -But you must be fair to me - Mohan"s voice trembled.
  -I rely on you.
  -Don"t do it.Don"t leave me alone.
  -It is left for the next life Mohanji.
  -No...
  Lakshmi smiled and made a bow to him.Mohan was on the point of crying.
  -After you I didn"t have any person in my life.
  -It didn"t mean anything for me.But simply Narayan must not know about it.
  -I promise you Laki.
  -Good-bye Mohanji.
  -Are you going?- Mohan asked with whisper.
  -I must go.
  Mohan approached to her.He slowly embraced her.And said with rage voice:
  -Take me, too!
  -I can"t.Everybody will go in their time.
  -Please take me, too.
  -What about Narayan?
  -Om will look after him.- Mohan leaned his brow against hers.
  -Take me!
  -That"s not my own business,Mohanji.
  Mohan smoothed her hair.Then he took them to his lips and kissed.He squeered his face and tried to suppress his tears.
  When he opened his eyes he found himself on the bed.The doctor measured his pressure.Mohan tried to get up.but the doctor didn"t let him.
  -Your pressure fell down.We made you injection.Don"t get up so early.
  -No, I must go there - Mohan stood up.
  -Somebody put something for you - said the doctor.
  -What is that?Who put it? - Mohan asked quickly.
  -That"s a little box.
  The doctor gave the box to him.Mohan opened the box.
  Lakshmi"s necklace and a paper inside it.He began to read the paper.
  "Give the necklace to Narayan.He has its key.Come to the railway station early morning.We are going to Vrindavan.It"s Narayan"s dream.After three days we will return back to Japan.I don"t take Narayan by force.
  Come, if he wants he will stay with you.Decide yourself.I couldn"t forgive you.Yesterdday Laki came to my dreams And asked for this.But I couldn"t reconcile with this,now when I came and saw you near her bed in the unconcious position.I felt sorry for you.If Laki forgave you let it be so.Though Narayan is your son Laki said that she wants to go.I can"t do it.I intrusted this authority to you in the written form.The warrant is the head physician.Desicion belongs to you.If you want you can set her free.If you don"t want,don"t do it then.But I reconciled for her lack.And she will always live in my heart.Yes she promised me that in the next life she will be my sister again.On that time I will keep you down till you will creep and beg in my yard.Be sure that I will revenge you."
  Mohan smiled with eyes full of tears...
  He exclaimed and left the room.
  
   ***
  
  During the whole way Narayan didn"t became gay. Om tried to keep up his spirit, but he didn"t achieve it.
  -Why are you morbid?
  -You said that this morning my father will come.
  -May be he was busy, but one day he will come without fail.
  -Perhaps he didn"t want me.
  -How do you know this? I am sure that if he will know you then he will love you too much.
  -My mother said so.
  -Be positive.Your mother told truth.
  -Where? My mother said that from that day when I won"t to come, but your father come.But where is he? My mother didn"t come from yesterday"s night.
  -She didn"t come?
  -No - Narayan exclaimed.
  -The anger suppressed Om.He stood up and went from the passenger carriage.He opened the window and tried to take a breathe.The languor suppressed himMAy be they put out Laki"s apparatus.
  He didn"t make a mistake.
  When Mohan read the letter he went to Laki"s room.He entered in and closed the door after him.
  He came near her and sleeked down Laki"s hair,which was trown on the pillow.He bent and sniffed them.Then he kissed them.And he put his head on her chest and lied near her.He began to cry calmly.
  Some time passed.Then he stored up fresh energy and went to the corridor.He called the nurse and said:
  -Please, say to the head physician to come with two witnesses.
  When Mohan signed the documents his tears dropped and driped on the paper.
  At last he approached to Laki and took her hands to his hands.Then he whispered with angry voice:
  -You are unjust.
  The doctor touched his shoulder silently and Mohan closed his eyes.Then the doctor out out the apparatus.In a moment Mohan became crazy.When the voice of the apparatus stopped Mohan shouted:
  -No...no! Laki...not yet...Stop!
  The doctor caught him.Mohan yelled and floundered.
  -No, don"t put out...No, please...Lakiiii.
  The nurse quickly took one soothing injection to his arm.Mohan got sleep in the sobbing.
  After some hours the pandit brought him Laki"s ashes and presented it to him.
  
  Mohan put the ashes in front of him around the Gang and settled on the land.
  Till morning he thought about every memory with Laki and cried.
  He didn"t want to meet Narayan in his this feeble satatus.Narayan reached Vrindavan at night.As though they waited for him in the temple.They gave them separate room.The self-sacrificers made a circle round Narayan and had a talk with him.
  On that night so that Nrarayan went to sleep,but Om flatly couldn"t get to sleep.In the morning in the olace firmamnet wasn"t daybraek,he went down directly to the Gang.He took a walk so much time,when he returned back he met Mohan,who dressed on the door.This time Narayan opened the door and went out.When he saw Mohan he quickly made a bow to him.
  Mohan smiled and squated in front of him:
  -Narayan,baby.It is being an unususal changes in the life.
  -But my mother said that there have no chace in life.
  -Your mother? -Mohan was on the point of crying.- she is all right.The he took out the necklace from his pocket and lengthened it to him.Narayan paired up his hands and prayed to Shree Krishna.The he put out the key of the necklace from his pocket and gave it to Mohan.
  -I knew that you are my father.
  -Yeah,- Mohan faltered.- How did you know it?
  -When I came to hospital everytime I met my mother there.When I asked the reason she said me.- said Narayan.
  Mohan embraced him.
  Om exclaimed and continued to keep silence.Mohan stood up and gave neckalce with its key to Om.
  -I didn"t need any proof.That"s yours.It belongs to you.I found my son.That"s enough for me.
  -Father.
  Mohan winced.It was for the first time which he heard this sentence.He returned and looked at his son with pride.
  -My mother aid that you will stay with us.
  -Yeah,she was right ,I will stay here.
  -Do you want to go to Japan? - Om asked Narayan.
  -Oh my dear uncle,may I stay with my father?
  Om smiled.
  -Of course.
  Narayan cried with happiness. Ohe.....yahoo
  Mohan approached to Om and shaked his hand.
  -Thank you so much.- Om shaked his head with consent.
  -I must go to the morning aratis.- Narayan began to speak in satisfied manner.
  -Go - said Om.
  Narayan went to the temple with rapid steps.Mohan opened the suitcase,which he put aside.He took the ashes crockery and said to Om:
  -Let"s go to put it out.
  When Om saw the crockery his knees became exhausted.He leaned against the tree which was near and closed his eyes.
  Mohan put his hand on his shoulder.
  -Let"s go till Narayan"s coming.
  When Om opened his eyes Mohan saw his tears.
  -Come on.
  They went down to the shore of the Gang together and put out the ashes which were in in the crockery hand-in-hand.At last Om Kneel down and began to cry silently.
  In the evening he charged Narayan to Mohan and went to the railway station.
  He set in the platform and began to wait the train.Then he remembered about the necklace and opened it.When he remebered Narayan he felt that he is missing him.But Narayan leaned against his back and persued the Gang which was in the sunset.
  When they turned back hand-in hand They met Om who was in front of the door.
  -Uncle - Narayan said and plunged him with happiness.Om stood up and clasped himin his arms.To tell the truth Narayan knew about his coming.
  -You didn"t go? - Narayan kissed him and asked.
  -No.I understood that my natives are here.I can"t stay remote without them.- said Om.
  Mohan smiled.Narayan embraced his uncle"s neck.And he did the "Splendid!" with hand sign to his mother,who took a stroll them from back.
  "They were together, All of them,The very Lakshmi..."
  
  
  
  
  
  The End
  
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