Пряхин Андрей Александрович : другие произведения.

The Best Film Самый лучший фильм

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    The Best Film. Drill Ground Episode. Unit Commander (actor Dmitry Naghiyev)https://youtu.be/EmiW8yhHdUM

  THE BEST FILM A DRILL GROUND EPISODE
  DRILL GROUND. Ranks of conscripts
  Unit Commander: You"re all shit!
  Conscripts: We"re all shit!
  UC: Shit ought to speak louder!
  Spectacled Con: We"re shit!!!
  UC: This is not a resort for you, Kalashnikov into my behind! This is the Ar-my-y-y! Trotyl into my arsehole! Even from such gays like you are our army makes the real men! Discharge into my anus! Have you understood me? You maybe think that you"ll be baby-sitted here, a jet into my hangar! Me myself will be knocking the nonsense out of your belfries, heavy cruiser into my bay! You are here to defend your country, but not to play that ... what"s-his-name ...Van`ka the Fool! Grasped it, you girls? All mass destruction weapons into my what?
  Spectacled Con: Into your bottom, Sir!
  UC: Say this in my lil ear!
  Spectacled Con: Into your bottom!
  UC: 100 duty orders out of turn!
  Voices: What for?
  UC: Look at yourselves, you greenhorns! You"re womanlike, not the muscle men, but puppies! Bow-wow! You must be dreaming of going to your mommies, of sucking their tits? Who will defend your mommies for you? Me? Or an Uncle Pete? Aunt Motya (short for Maria.-AAO)? Soon you gonna be the soldiers of the Red Army! It"ll make men even from such schmos as you are!
  Spectacled Con: What do you permit yourself, Sir?!
  UC: Now concretely. Mr. Fierce, Jack the Sparrow, Gioconda, Motherfucker, make a step forward! Yesterday, I'll be damned, these four pieces of shit, I'll be damned, banged our common female cook in the indecent, perverted way while wearing not ironed uniforms and dirty boots!
  They (licking the naked cook): Goddess! Tasty! Snow White!
  UC: Now she"s in the family way! Commander in Chief ordered to send you to the positions of the legendary ... e-e-e-h tenth company
  AFGHANISTAN Indicator reads: Moscow - 4,000 km, Tashkent - 1,000 km, Hemp Field - 5 km, WC -23 m, Hohol`s Tent - 35 cm.... Mr. Fierce, Jack the Sparrow, Gioconda, Motherfucker are entering the tent of the company commander nicknamed Hohol (informal for a Ukrainian. - AAO).
  Hohol (while getting out of the portable solarium): Congratulations on your arrival at the positions of the valiant Tenth Company! I can"t understand your silence, warriors, congratulations on the arrival at the positions of the valiant Tenth Company!
  Mr. Fierce, Jack the Sparrow, Gioconda, Motherfucker: Hurrah, Hurrah, Hurrah!
  Hohol (stretching his hand): Hohol!
  Mr. Fierce: Yakut! (and is knocked down by a Hohol who hasn`t cottoned on to his joke)
  THE END

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