Zalesski Vladimir Vladimirovich : другие произведения.

The Sketch how academicians have become cheerful again

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    The Sketch how academicians have become cheerful again

  The Sketch how academicians have become cheerful again
  
  
  Academicians gathered and think: "Why in Russia the science not really quickly develops?"
  
  Began to express their views.
  
  The first speaker explains: "In what a difference between "just mad" and, for example, "inventor", "scientist"?" "The madman sits in a madhouse on a state ration, and the inventor, the scientist has certain rights, some public respect, receives a certain money, and is engaged in the business".
  
  The second adds: "to separate the 'most capable and intelligent' from the 'ordinary' people, the Academy of Sciences was established!"
  
  Academics came to life.
  
  The chairman in a meeting rubbed a forehead: "And why she was necessary, Academy?"
  
  The third speaker gives the reference: "Let's say Cossacks come to the Empress and say: "There is such a territory - Siberia is called". The Empress thinks: "This Siberia needs to be investigated, described in a scientific style". She establishes the Academy of Sciences. In addition, there are crazy: they invent some intricate mechanisms. Put them in a madhouse? But news comes from the West: some mechanisms appear there. These lunatics are sent to the Academy of Sciences. There mentally ill people perform loyalty rituals plus explain the ideas. And after that, some of them can be recognized as "scientists" and "inventors". You can give them some money, show them to someone, and so on."
  
  The chairman strictly looked at participants of a meeting.
  
  "In Great Britain there were events", - the fourth speaker explained.
  
  Academics were wary.
  
  "It was relative long ago - about two centuries ago".
  
  Academicians relaxed.
  
  "There was such a scientist Faraday. There is no possibility to speak about him in detail now. He wrote a book about his numerous scientific experiences. Later this book got to Thomas Edison!"
  
  In the hall the silence hung.
  
  "That's where things started - in America! This Thomas Edison had no higher education, but had initiative, energy, knowledge, read the book by Faraday. And he started to invent!"
  
  Academicians began to look at each other.
  
  "But all would-nothing. But on his life path he met some Colonel! Colonel played the stock market and thanks to the invention of Edison earned a lot of money!"
  
  Academicians pretended that they yawn.
  
  "So this Colonel paid for an invention to Thomas Edison several tens of thousands of dollars. For those times it was the enormous sum!" "Thomas Edison founded firm, and this firm advanced numerous scientific and technical innovations!"
  
  Academicians got out newspapers and magazines and went deep into their reading.
  
  "Events began in America", - the chairman sadly repeated.
  
  "There passed a time and the film was shot in America. "The Social Network" is called. Not the doctor of science and not the candidate of science, and just the student of the university, had the idea, knowledge, energy and initiative. He created firm and became the rich person", - the fifth speaker added.
  
  The chairman got out the newspaper too and began to read it.
  
  "Lawsuits began: whose idea was used by the student?", - the fifth speaker continued. - "As a result the number of rich people increased. All were happy in own way: the student who created firm, the authors of the idea, users of social network".
  
  In the hall a silence hung.
  
  "Let's read not Faraday, but classics! Remember: "Friends, our union is fine!"", - the sixth speaker offered. - "In Russia there was not a colonel, but the Marshal was. Vague memoirs remained that mentally ill people wrote "Moscow. To Josef Vissarionovich". (Strange there was a person: from property left behind a peak-cap, an overcoat and something from clothes ... Well, and the mighty country ...). And so. Were given money and opportunities for these mentally ill people to be engaged in technical inventions, in technical creativity. We have a potential not small too".
  
  Academicians hid newspapers and magazines and looked at the speaker.
  
  The chairman with pleasure inclined the head.
  
  "Let's face the truth, colleagues!" - the seventh speaker offered. - "The talented, knowing, initiative people with the ideas have self-esteem and are inclined to independent behavior. Let's remember e-e-e, well, whatever. In short, let us remember Henry Thomas Buckle. He in general did not study anywhere (he was not even a student!!!) and anywhere (for any employer) did not work. Unexpectedly wrote the book about a civilization and learned a set of foreign languages on a personal initiative. It seems, this book well was on sale, and Buckle received quite good money for (in exchange of) his work. But we not in vain instead of the book by Faraday read newspapers and magazines. It is clear, that in Russia the person for (in exchange of) real knowledge and an initiative and for (in exchange of) the achievements receives not money and respect, and - problems. But there is an option. The similar person comes to us, performs loyalty rituals plus explains the ideas. And after that some of similar visitors can be recognized as "scientists" and "inventors", "scientific businessmen". It may be possible to give them "along a food chain" some money, to show them to someone and so on. (Some of them may apply for positions of officials). So our Academy was necessary (in the past), now is necessary and will be necessary (in the future)".
  
  Academicians became cheerful. They awarded the seventh speaker with an applause.
  
  The Chairman from emotion blotted eyes a handkerchief:
  
  - So, why in Russia the science not really quickly develops?
  
  
  January 9, 2019 19:57
  
  
  Translation from Russian into English: January 9, 2019 22:23.
  Владимир Владимирович Залесский "Скетч о том, как академики снова стали веселыми".
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