# Changing plans under the influence of fear. A story

Henry de Overwood

MMMDCXC. Changing plans under the influence of fear. A story. - August 21, 2025.

Changing plans under the influence of fear. A story.


This situation happened a few years ago. My mother suddenly felt unwell, and a period of "illness" began. Prior to this period, she felt various ailments and often visited doctors.


The sudden deterioration of her health led to an increasing of time she spent visiting medical institutions and communicating with doctors.


At some point, she and I began to suspect that her passing away was possible. Both she and I felt that there might be a question of placing her in a medical institution (hospital) to "save her life."


We conferred several times. We decided that she would refuse to be moved from home to a medical facility (that is, she would "refuse to be hospitalized").


Due to her state of health, she stopped visiting medical institutions and doctors. Doctors were regularly called to the house.


One day, it so happened that the doctors arrived at the house at the same time: (1) a general practitioner from some local medical organization, (2) a specialist in some special field, (3) an emergency physician.


Anton Pavlovich Chekhov, who was a doctor, could have described the situation in the best possible way.


There was a question about hospitalization - about moving my mother to a hospital for treatment. She refused.


The center of information flows has shifted to me. I learned that her moving to a hospital can be useful and life-saving, and continuing to be at home (of a patient - my mother) is highly likely to lead to a tragic outcome.


The arriving of three representatives of the medical profession - simultaneously, at (in) one chronological point, was an accident event. I was not prepared for the situation - psychologically.


I was in front of three medical specialists in the role of a person who, of his own free will, can make a fateful decision. And I was scared. I went up to my mother and explained to her that experts were talking about the usefulness of her temporary relocation to a medical facility and about the enormous risk to her health if she stayed at home.


I told all this based on the information I have just received. Thus, four people were in favor of hospitalization - three specialists and me, her son.


She looked at me (I think there was surprise in her eyes) and agreed to be hospitalized. Well, if that's what I, her son, want. ...


It is difficult for any person to reform their life when a close relative is hospitalized.


Everything is a huge burden. I tried to visit her every day. On some days, I had to go to a medical facility (and return from it) at a time when public transport stopped running (at deep night). Somewhere the dark city streets, somewhere - illuminated ones; a flooded with light, deserted corridors ... Time, nerves, physical effort - in general, huge expenses of any kind.


Sometimes I saw her lying on the bed with her hands tied to the edges of the bed - it was explained to me that she was behaving restlessly and was trying to rip off the bandages.


What she told me testified to the enormous level of her psychological discomfort.


Finally, the hospital treatment was completed. It was time to bring her home. Naturally, the treatment was not completed. It was necessary to continue the treatment measures.


My mother returned home. And I unexpectedly discovered that the new stage of her treatment at home is many times more difficult than the stage that took place before her temporary transfer to the hospital.


In general, what is "a proper treatment"? Whom I must to be, in order to organize "proper treatment" at home?


First, I had to be a medical specialist, second, I had to be (with some exaggeration) a dollar millionaire, third, I had to be a very organized person - something like a huge business center, but not in a collective performance, but in an individual implementation.


I was ready to show miracles of (self-) organization. But I did not have the opportunity to pass exams at a medical institute as an external student as well as to open a bank account with a million dollars [literary exaggeration] - in a few weeks.


From a medical point of view, I (suddenly, unexpectedly for me) was given the responsibility of treating a person (patient) whose health was in an exceptionally difficult and complex situation.


But even if all three conditions were (would) present, and I made an attempt to organize "proper treatment", what could be the result of my efforts? Someone, very qualified (and not alone) would be in the apartment, near the patient? A very qualified person is busy with established duties. If we follow this line of reasoning, then it was necessary to continue to treat my mother in a hospital.


Before hospitalization, my mother's health was deteriorating (that is why we had previously decided not to agree to her hospitalization), it did not noticeably improve in the medical institution, it continued to deteriorate after she returned home. After some time, she told me that my worries would soon end. Late in the evening, I discovered that she was not breathing.


But during this period, a "subtle" legal situation arose. I - after her return - turned out to be a person to whom the reproach "of improper treatment" could be addressed. And this reproach could entail a lot of legal consequences for me.


And now I look at this situation and think: what are the results of changing plans under the influence of fear?


My mother could have been at home, in relatively comfortable home conditions. She might have been restless, but I wouldn't have tied her hands. She wouldn't have had any hospital (female) roommates - very peculiar individuals.


I wouldn't have had any overloads - of any kind (overloads that, in fact, didn't produce any positive results). It was her right to refuse hospitalization, and I had the right to support her decision. I - a person without significant medical knowledge - would not have found myself in a situation of additional legal risks, in an extremely vulnerable legal position. I wouldn't have had the "obligation" (which was practically an impossible to fulfill) to organize "proper treatment" at home - after she returned home.


This was a life experience of the kind that few people get, and few people analyze.


August 21, 2025 07:29


Translation from Russian into English: August 21, 2025 17:53

Владимир Владимирович Залесский ' Изменение планов под влиянием страха. Рассказ. '


{3719. Изменение планов под влиянием страха. Рассказ. - 21 августа 2025 г.

MMMDCXC. Changing plans under the influence of fear. A story. - August 21, 2025.


Vladimir Zalessky Internet-bibliotheca. Интернет-библиотека Владимира Залесского}