Аннотация: Report to Anderson. An intimate conversation in the infirmary. Dr. Chakwas' test.
Chapter 5: Who are you?
Damn the report!
The captain almost shook the soul out of me, trying to find something that wasn't there. Well, there were NO drawings of weapons or super-technologies in the information buoy of the protean! THERE WASN'T! But Anderson didn't want to believe it. Here, take it to him and describe the visions in DETAIL. What kind of visions are there? A set of fragmentary images that have just begun to pass awareness!
I was saved by Dr. Chakwas' call for an "examination". After getting permission to go, I rushed to the infirmary at a speed close to teleportation. But I'm about to be questioned thoughtfully...
In the infirmary, Dylan and Darg were found sitting sullenly on their beds and waiting for the end of the examination.
Dr. Chakvas practiced high-tech shamanism using laboratory equipment instead of a tambourine. At least for me, her actions were at about the same level of understanding. Judging by the faces of the fighters, it's the same for them.
"Commander Shepard," Karin said, momentarily distracted from her work. "Wait a minute."
I sat down on the edge of an empty bed, watching the doctor with interest. But as I approached the partition, I heard a thin squeak: Nihlus woke up as soon as the power source was nearby and the energy flow increased dramatically.
"Darg" The doctor approached the fighter and handed him a package of pills. "I really hope they don't end up in the recycling bin like the previous ones."
"They won't be." he answered gloomily.
"Good." Karin smiled slightly from the corners of her lips. "Dismissed."
The soldiers blew themselves up and moved towards the exit.
"For everyone on this ship, Spectre Kraike is dying." Chakwas added. "I'll expect you for an examination tomorrow at the same time."
"Understood." Dylan replied, and both fighters left the infirmary.
Nihlus took his eyes off my people only when the doors closed behind them. And the look was VERY thoughtful.
The situation turns out to be interesting. Dr. Chakwas has made it clear that Dylan and Darg are trustworthy people. I knew this myself: Imrir's fragmentary memory did not leave many memories of her past, but in all the fragments after Torfan, these two men were completely trustworthy.
"Time. Few." Nihlus said in a barely audible voice, lifting the metal prism with two fingers.
"How much?"
"Twenty minutes. A day later. It's charging. Long." He was silent for a couple of minutes, breathing heavily. "Imrir. Borrow it. Them. Let them think. Logic. It will help. Extinguishes anger. I know."
It didn't take much intelligence to figure out who Nihlus was trying to talk about. He saw the rage of the Derg. The question is: what did the Turian see in my fighters that made him react so sharply? There must be a reason forcing him to speak despite the intense pain. A VERY significant reason!
"The consequences?"
"Battle rage. They won't stop..." Nihlus stammered and gasped for breath.
"Will do." I rubbed my temples wearily. "Nihlus. When you can have a conversation without risking your health, I'll give you the answers to your questions. Is this acceptable?"
The green eyes stared hard and intently. Against the background of a jet-black white, the green iris seemed to glow from within, giving the Turian's gaze an unnatural expressiveness and sharpness. It's like looking into the eyes of a demon. Interesting visual effect. My recipient really disliked looking Nihlus in the eye: it seemed that the piercing gaze saw the very soul, turning it inside out. And the girl had something to hide.
A barely perceptible nod made it clear that Nihlus understood me and accepted the terms of our deal. He won't try to ask uncomfortable questions until he recovers, but then... then I have to give answers. Honest, sincere and without double interpretation. And I will give these answers: when the time comes for a conversation, I will go through the chain of events to its end, and the Turian's life will not be threatened by the truth.
Nihlus' death is a key factor that triggers a chain of events on Eden Prime, much more rigidly prescribed than the death of the same Jenkins, which does not affect anything at all. According to all the laws of this reality, regardless of the possible and acceptable scenarios for the development of history, Spectr Nihlus Kraik MUST die at the hands of Spectr Saren Arterius.
My intervention has stretched the chain of events, forcing reality to respond and change, and she is extremely reluctant to take such liberties: she always resists, tries to return history to normal, not wanting to break away from the egregore that gave her life. This chain of events culminates in obtaining the status of a Spectr, and until I become a Spectr, any, even the most insignificant attempt by Kraik to influence my actions or the circumstances of obtaining this ill-fated status is guaranteed death from a series of fatal accidents. Therefore, the Turian will remain on board the Normandy, and information about his condition will not leave the infirmary.
However, besides Kraik, there is another reasonable one who is very, very eager to ask me questions. And in this case, no excuses and attempts to delay time will help.
"Doctor, do you have any questions that you would like to know the answers to immediately?"
"There is." the gray eyes looked very hard. "Who are you?"
And here is this most sacramental question.
I sat down on the cot more comfortably, put my hands on my knees, studying the woman standing in front of me. I'll have to answer. Dr. Chakwas is too important to mess up with. And Imrir still has some kind of reverent attitude towards this woman, although I know FOR SURE: before 'Normandy', my recipient and the doctor had never crossed paths in person.
It just so happened that from life to life, I had truly loyal companions with enviable regularity, one of whom was ALWAYS a doctor or a murderer. Sometimes it's both. Can Karin Chakvas become such an associate? Maybe. If I can convince her. Besides, it's now. I can't lie, she won't forgive me for lying, even if she understands its necessity. She's not that kind of person.
I could barely contain my laughter. Life doesn't teach me anything! How many have already betrayed, but still the desire to trust has not died completely. Maybe it's for the best?
We'll see.
"Imrir Shepard."
"You are not Imrir. I know her well enough." Chakwas replied reasonably.
"Technically, I'm really Imrir."
"What do you mean, technically?"
"The body is the same. The memories were partially preserved." I answered honestly, watching with interest as the expression of the gray eyes changed. Nihlus listened in silence, with his eyes slightly closed. But you're not her.
"But you're not her."
"No. Do you remember that strange seizure a couple of days ago?"
The Doctor nodded.
"It was the agony of death. Mine and my recipient's. It was at that moment that clinical death occurred for a moment, and Imrir Shepard's soul went into rebirth, and I was thrust into her place. It should be noted that the girl's next life will be VERY successful and prosperous. Unlike this one. These are my compensation for the interrupted existence."
The doctor folded her arms over her chest, frowning at me. Well, yes, my words are the ravings of a drunken satyr. Believe me. But I'll have to do something.
"Are you saying that you took over the Commander's body after her death?"
"Borrowed it?" I chuckled. "They shoved me into it, completely uninterested in my opinion and desire."
"Who?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know?" the woman asked.
"I DO NOT KNOW the mechanism of rebirth." I replied calmly. "Who is launching it? Who chooses the recipient and the donor? How does this happen? There are assumptions, of course, but there is no EXACT knowledge. And those of my colleagues who know don't tell me." I grimaced. "The standard answer is: 'The time will come, and the truth will be revealed to you'."
"And you calmly tell me about it..." The doctor hesitated for a moment and corrected herself. "Us?"
"Dr. Chakwas." I sighed wearily. "Imrir trusted you. I do not know what caused this trust: her memories of her life are quite fragmentary, especially those related to studying at N7. I only remember my childhood and youth well. Not the most pleasant one, it should be noted." I replied calmly. "Few people think about WHAT life was like for a beautiful orphan girl who ran away from an orphanage to the streets of a megalopolis in her pajamas at the age of six. I'm completely amazed that this child managed to survive there alone. I couldn't help but let out a hard, cold laugh. Beautiful girls don't run away from a good life to join the army at eighteen, Doctor. I'm going to have leads and problems for a long time because of the recipient's disfigured psyche."
Nihlus's gaze became completely unreadable, but the mandibles pressed tightly to his cheeks and clenched fingers showed that the Turian was in a quiet rage.
"At Imrir's. Mental problems?" he asked jerkily.
"She actually has it destroyed."
"She was repeatedly checked by psychologists of the Alliance." Chakwas said.
I looked at the ash-haired woman. How would it be more delicate to explain the depth of the problem?.. But, however, why be considerate? They want to know the truth, don't they? Well, they'll find out."
"Doctor, I can read these tests to you verbatim from memory with all the possible answers and their full transcription." I replied earnestly, and the doctor's eyes widened slightly in understanding of what was said. "Imrir has a good memory and she REALLY wanted to escape from her home planet."
"That's what she is... "
"filled them out from memory. And she ironically followed her chosen line of behavior, cutting off from herself anyone who might understand that everything was far from okay with her. Torfan broke her completely: the death of the fighters, who became the only family for Imrir, became the last grain of sand, the weight of which breaks the cable." I shifted my gaze to the Turian. "Nihlus. You have chosen a candidate for the Spectr with a broken psyche, who hates people and non-people equally, with progressive psychosis and incipient schizophrenia. Congratulations on that."
Nihlus fell into a stupor from this, just blinked in confusion, trying to digest the entertaining news. Well, he hadn't noticed the elephant. Just like everyone else. Imrir has really learned how to simulate the behavior of an adequate person. She's a smart girl, you can't say anything.
"This... suddenly." finally the doctor said, nervously clenching her fingers.
I shrugged my shoulders.
"If it comforts you, Imrir will live a happy life. The one I dreamed of. These are the laws of exchange."
"What. You will..." Nihlus stammered, slowly sucking in short, convulsive breaths.
"What am I going to do?"
He closed his eyes.
"That's what... to deal with the pile of problems we find ourselves in. I'm Imrir Shepard now, whether I like it or not."
"Don't you like it?" the doctor asked.
"And who would like to be on the edge of an escalating conflict? Doctor, I have a dead Spectre in my hands, killed by a legend of the Special Corps, a Geth attack on an Alliance colony, a huge ship that came from nowhere, leaving a half-kilometer fused bald spot after its launch."
"Spectr Kraik is alive."
"He's only alive because I've done everything possible for him. If I hadn't powered up the spaceport, it wouldn't have lasted until the ship arrived. The wound is fatal."
Nihlus nodded in agreement.
"What is your name?"
"Imrir." seeing the misunderstanding, I explained: "I don't remember the name given to me at birth in the zero life." A soft chuckle broke out by itself. "You don't think that this kind of existence remains without consequences, do you?"
"You say..." Chakwas paused.
"Do I have any mental problems? No. My mind is as stable as I need it to be." Seeing the question in her eyes, I explained: "Sometimes there are situations when, without some degree of madness, you can be guaranteed to lose your mind or reach a personality collapse."
Doubt shone brightly in the doctor's eyes. In my right mind and sober memory. And I can't even judge her. What I said is crazy and illogical. But... That's the truth, what can you do.
Is it that important? Closing my eyes, I repeated what I had said:
"Blood is the moisture of life. The quintessence of it. Blood carries the life force and energy of a sentient being. It doesn't matter what its composition is or what the body's biochemistry is. This?"
Nihlus nodded, closed his eyes with satisfaction, and smiled slightly, spreading his mandibles.
"I believe it." shortness of breath.
Just like that? Do I believe?
"Why?"
"Turian. You speak clearly." There was a flicker of irony in the green eyes. "People. Can not."
Do I speak Turian? Turning off the translator on the instrument, I repeated a couple of phrases out loud, listening to the sound of the words. It's really not English. Harsh growling words with a strange, barely audible sub-harmony and vibration. The voice box could barely handle playback, but it did. Have minor changes in the body already begun? I really hope so.
"How is this possible?" Dr. Chakwas frowned. "Imrir Shepard was a human."
Shrugging my shoulders, I replied:
"The consequences of the transfer. Reality, accepting me, gives me the knowledge and abilities necessary for a full-fledged existence within its limits. I am an instrument of the universe. I am fulfilling the task assigned to me, whether I want to or not."
"And what is this task?"
"I'm sorry, Dr. Chakwas, but this... That's not the information I'm ready to share right now." I replied calmly.
Karin immediately understood the hint that I might change my mind over time. Yes, and Nihlus looked thoughtfully, rolling the prism of the jammer between his fingers.
"Why are you talking?" The Turian finally asked.
"What do you think, Nihlus, what are the chances of single-handedly changing the fate of the entire reality?"
The answer was an EXTREMELY expressive look.
"That's what I think. Without help, I can only lead her to her death, and it doesn't take much effort. It is enough to let events take their course."
"Change the fate of reality? Is this the task?"
"Rather, a solution path. Believe me, Dr. Chakwas, you will not like this fate. Unless, of course, you are eager to see the most devastating war in the history of human civilization, in which you will be defeated."
What I'm doing now is playing on the verge of a foul. Either I get the support of Kraick and Chakwas, or I have to... neutralize the results of your gullibility. As much as I hate this outcome, I don't want to risk their disbelief. Mentalism will soon begin to manifest itself. Enough to correct other people's memories.
I REALLY hope it doesn't come to that.
In principle, there are chances to get an ally. Nihlus is inclined to believe me. But why? Was he convinced by my ability to speak his native language? Or something else? Then I'll talk to my dear mentor. In private. In any case, he won't turn me in. He'd rather kill himself if I posed a threat than expose our shared failure to the public: him, as a mentor who made the wrong choice, and me, as a screwed-up candidate. But with the doctor, everything is much more complicated. She's in no hurry to believe. She wasn't too convinced by my words and the knowledge that came out of nowhere. It will be difficult to convince her, but... It's better to convince. I saw how reverently my fighters treat her. If I harm this woman, I will make some VERY unpleasant enemies.
I hope she doesn't disappoint me...
"Imrir, can you take one test?" Dr. Chakwas asked softly, handing me the datapad. "This is my personal development."
"Why not?"
I picked up my datapad, sat on my bunk, and took the test. Nihlus turned off his device for a while and closed his eyes. The Turian was breathing heavily, but gradually his breathing steadied. I slightly squeezed the power supply channel, and my handler instantly switched off. The devices immediately reacted to the change in the patient's condition and beeped faintly, attracting the doctor's attention.
"What is it?" Karin's gaze darted between the screens.
"It's time to sleep." I muttered under my breath, increasing the output of energy.
The indicators returned to normal, but Nihlus did not wake up: the fainting gradually turned into sleep. The doctor smiled out of the corners of her lips: the hint was understood and approved.
Commander, the test.
A test is a test...
***
The doctor was clearly on a roll when she did this freaking test! I spent more than two hours on it, trying to wade through hundreds of tricky questions with a bunch of hidden meanings in them. If I was still trying to analyze the first hundred and somehow think about the answers, then after the second one I wrote what came to mind, without really bothering to think about the result. May it burn with fire! You can't predict what's going to come out anyway. After setting up the last answer, I handed over the datapad.
"Doctor, I'm done."
Karin smiled, seeing my sidelong glance, took the device and immersed herself in reading my writing, and I was plunged into despondency from the realization of the situation. I've just been beautifully divorced and taken over. And I also voluntarily confessed.
On the other hand, what do I have to lose? I need the Doctor as an ally. Or at least not an enemy. She should know about my abilities. At least about the possibility of their existence, since he will witness their application in practice more than once. Unless, of course, I can somehow get rid of this damn ship! But I want to. Watching the doctor's impassive face and the barely perceptible flare of her emotions, my despondency deepened and deepened: it was too interesting a cocktail. And fun, and curiosity, and surprise, and misunderstanding, and outright stupefaction. I wonder what this reaction is about? I don't think I've written anything so criminal...
"That's a very interesting result, Commander," Chakwas finally said.
I don't even want to know the results from the tone in which it was said.
"Is it that bad?" I asked despondently.
"Well, why is that? I expected the worst." They smiled at me with a kind smile that sent chills down my spine.
"I am glad that I did not meet your worst expectations."
"Come on, Commander. Your results are extremely interesting. I don't see anything... the bad one. I'll expect you for an examination tomorrow at the same time."
"Can I go now?"
"Of course, Commander."
I was graciously shown the exit, making it clear that they would not give up YET.